I was raised in a fairly sex positive household…

I was raised in a fairly sex positive household so I was surprised when many of my friends in high school had very different attitudes. It was confusing. I was flipping between feeling excited about sex and ashamed of how I felt. I have to admit that being sexually open gave me a sense of power over boys and men. I learned that I could be seductive. But that seductiveness was, ultimately, a game with patriarchal rules and negative consequences.